Advent

 Advent, Hurrah! I like Advent. The hymns are EXCELLENT - the best section in the hymn book.  I like having a proper Advent calendar with a lovely picture of the Nativity but no chocolate in it and I like disapproving of the Spiderman Advent calendars and the My Little Pony ones in the shops. I look forward to Christmas which among other things is an excuse for fine wines. The Collect for Advent is one I hold dear. The only drawback is having to go to Confession, but even that's wonderful once it's over. The whole thing is a marvellous antidote to the horrors of English winter.

 

The Annunciation by Fra Angelico

 

I shall now list some of the excellent hymns.

Lo He comes with clouds descending, tune Helmsley. Superb tune, and some of the words are great (not all of them though, I must admit, "Deeply wailing" (verse 2) is a bit much but with that tune you are willing to put up with anything); the best bit is in the last verse

"Yea, Amen! let all adore Thee,

High on Thine eternal throne;

Saviour, take the power and glory,

Claim the kingdom for Thine own;"

                i.e. Go for it Jesus mate.

Come thou long expected Jesus. It is essential to sing this to the tune Cross of Jesus by Stainer. A first class number, with sterling work done on the words by Charles Wesley. He had a hand in Lo he comes with clouds descending as well, but this one got away without any wailing and so much the better.

On Jordan's Bank the Baptist's cry. This has the same tune as Ride on Ride on in Majesty, i.e. Winchester New, which is one of the aces.

These last 2 contain many good lines including "whose Advent sets thy people free", and "Israel's strength and consolation", which are two of my favourite remarks in all church literature.

Giovanni Bellini cracks it, big time.
Madonna and Child
 

 As we get nearer to Christmas a few rather tedious Christmas ones begin to creep in eg. In the Bleak Midwinter, an organist's nightmare with irregular metre in the different verses making it totally unsuitable for a hymn in my opinion. I used to play the hymns for a vicar who was OBSESSED with this one for some reason and we had it ten times per church (he ran several) per Christmas season, minimum. Really. Needless to say I now can't stand it, or its annoying tune Cranham though I am sorry about that since it was written by Holst. The words (Christina Rossetti is responsible) are  repetitive, sanctimonious and daft. How cold does it get in Bethlehem anyway? Ha! I've looked it up and the average lowest temperature never falls below 41°F (5°C) at any time in the year. In such a climate frosty winds are unlikely to make moan and the earth is almost certainly never as hard as iron. Christina my dear, your whole premise has just been exposed as balderdash, and we now have an excuse not to sing this infuriating carol ever again.

 

The Advent season culminates in the Carol Service at Oare with the cream of Exmoor society present, 6pm Christmas Eve all welcome and a very good occasion which people ought to see for a fine old-fashioned example of how life used to be. Sometimes the hounds attend. Actually that's a lie but they do attend weddings, if the couple hunt. There are port and mince pies in the aisle afterwards. The churchwardens ensure that the only carols used are ones that everyone i) knows and ii) wants to sing, and the lessons are read from the King James Bible. The Magnificat is sung to Henry Smart's excellent chant which everyone is familiar with as it is the one Dudley Moore used in his splendid rendition of "As I was walking down the street one day : I saw a house on fire."

 

 Usually Gerald the drinking shepherd lurches in through the door at the last minute crying "Never fear - Gerald is here", and is sent to the back where he engages the organist (me) in ribald banter during the service and displays scant respect for the offices of the Holy Church. He attends church twice a year, for this Carol Service and the Harvest Festival where with an admirable sense of humour the Rector gives him the duty of carrying the wine up the aisle when the various gifts are brought forward. As he walks back down after handing over the bottle, he receives congratulations from his friends and relatives in the congregation.

 

Once the port has all gone and the final blessing is given, the people of the Oare beau monde disperse to their own homes / go out to feed the cattle / repair to the inn, and are not seen again till the Boxing Day meet.