Heroic Priests

During the recent events at Kiev the Priests of the Eastern Orthodox Church have been showing everyone how being a priest ought to be done. They are operating at peak excellence and it is inspiring for us all. Even the Times, which hates Christians, has been printing pictures which elicit admiration for the priests and which do a lot to strengthen the faith of many of us. These men are real shepherds and bravely stand among their flock as priests should. Look at this one here:

The soldier is pointing a gun straight at his head but he just stands there like Gentle Jesus. This is v helpful not just for his congregation there but for us who see the picture as well and I thank the Lord for it. In the picture you can see the soldier looking at the photographer and thinking 'Damn, I'd better not. This wouldn't look good. Else I would.'

Here's how we like our priests - tough as hell and holding a cross.

Dispensing strength and consolation

Meanwhile our Archbishop (Welby) has announced that he thinks the govt. cuts in welfare are the reason the Food Banks are in greater demand than they used to be. Well well. He has said there will be a £10,000 enquiry about it. £10,000 to find out what he already knows. What does he think it's going to discover? That the increased need is brought about because President Putin has been sticking pins into a voodoo doll of England? That the gay weddings are causing it?

Bags of rice are a Food Bank staple and cost 40p (8/-) for  1kg (2lb 3¼oz) if you buy the Value brand. Hence Archbishop Welby's £10,000 enquiry junket money could have bought 25,000 bags of rice providing 176,250 portions - and that is assuming a 5oz portion which is generous enough for my teenagers who have very inefficient metabolisms and eat accordingly. That's 176,250 meals foregone, just to check whether Vladimir Putin has been doing voodoo on us. Not money well spent.

At the Porlock Tannery Food Bank the greed for free food has caused resort to underhand and deceitful activity as may be seen by the following. This voucher was issued in good faith to one penniless hungry teenager:

He tried to hoodwink the authorities into trebling the amount and when it was therefore refused others got hold of it and in attempting to re-designate it defaced it, multiple times, rendering it invalid - See below : 

Result: no lemon ice cream for anyone. I get to eat it all myself. It is very delicious and if anyone would like the recipe please leave me a message.